Review: Tell Me It's Real by T.J. Klune

Tell Me It's Real by T.J. Klune

Tell Me It's Real by T.J. Klune
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Tell Me It's Real is the best book I've read in awhile. It's a mm romance and the first of three books in the At First Sight series by T.J. Klune. I laughed so hard reading this one that I'm sure I scared my neighbors. It's cute and sweet too, but with a lot of self-deprecating humor and sarcasm.


To help you get a grasp of what this book is like, this is the first line:

"JUST so you know, I don’t have a gargantuan penis."

What?! A main character that isn't hot, buff, with a huge cock and someone everyone wants? How can it be?!

Paul is plain, slightly overweight, and average. His black hair is cut short so it doesn't curl like a poodle's, he has plain blue eyes and pasty white skin. He blushes and stutters, and when he gets really nervous he sort of spews words. That's when he's not tripping or being clumsy.

Although to be fair, he sort of spews words constantly. Awkward jokes, sarcasm and whatever he's thinking come out at an alarming rate. You know that filter some people have? Well, Paul's doesn't really work very well, especially when he's freaked out about a hot guy talking to him (although to be fair, he managed to keep back most of one of the most horrendous jokes one could possibly make, and that was after nearly managing to choke to death on spinach).

Paul sort of reminds me of Tina Belcher from Bob's Burgers. Maybe a sort of combo of Gene Belcher and Tina. Awkward and cute, snarky and obsessed with butts. But with a bit more self-awareness of social hierarchy. I guess that would make Vince, the other MC, into Jimmy Pesto, Jr. Maybe Jimmy crossed with Zeke. but instead of being a jerkface, Vince is the cool kid that actually has a heart of gold.



Vince is gorgeous and not the sharpest crayon in the box, but he's very sweet and adores Paul. Though Paul can't quite figure out why. He's sure it's some sort of set-up. Everyone knows hot jock gayboys don't go for awkward and overweight weirdos. Of course Paul runs as fast as he can. It's a good thing Vince is steady and determined. Vince knows if he just keeps on him Paul will fold. He's used to people giving him what he wants, and what he wants is the quirky guy who can't seem to manage ten minutes without stuttering or stumbling or otherwise looking cute.

Even when Paul hits Vince with his car (He didn't hit him! Vince ran into the car! It was an accident! Paul did not, I repeat, did not hit the hottest guy in the world with his car just to get a date. Paul already turned down the date. If only the rest of the world would believe him.) Vince just tells him that he's starting to fall in love with him and it was totally worth it.

Oh, and Vince stoned is cuter than puppies. Lots of 'awww' and wanting to cuddle him. How could Paul resist?

All the people in Paul's life want him to have his one true love. They can see his genuine heart and his fun personality, and they keep hoping someone else will see who he truly is. When Vince shows up on the scene they start shoving Paul into his arms because finally someone else sees how incredible Paul is too.

Sandy, Paul's best friend is outrageous and a diva, though not quite as much when he's not in drag as Helena Handbasket. Together with Paul, the two make a comedic duo that could scare anyone away.

“You’re like that donkey from Winnie the Pooh,” he told me. “On crack.” 

“I’m a manic-depressive, drug-addicted donkey?” I asked, incredulous. 

“If the tail fits,” he snapped at me. 

“Reality would be if Eeyore was on Paxil. No one could be depressed as much as he is for that long without needing antidepressants. Winnie the Pooh and Piglet probably staged an intervention at their house at one point.” 

“They didn’t live together,” Sandy said. 

“Of course they did. They were life partners.” 

“Pooh was porking Piglet?” 

“Brings new meaning to the sentence ‘I ate ham for breakfast.’” 

“I bet there’s like an Easter egg on one of the DVDs,” Sandy said, taking a drink of his tea. “A deleted scene that shows Eeyore jerking off to a photo of Pooh fucking Piglet while hanging himself with his tail in the closet.”

Yep, this book doesn't shy away from much. Besides the bitchy queen best friend, there's a homophobic parrot that shouts slurs, a Nana who tells it like it is, a two-legged dog named Wheels, possibly a menstruating ghost haunting Paul's house, and a pair of parents that care about their son so much that they don't care if he's into pony play and likes to wear a tail (no matter how many times he tries to tell him that that's not his kink).





Some people will be offended by this book. Some people will think it's sick and twisted which makes it hilarious. I'm one of the latter.

There's a lot of slang, a lot of rambling, and quite a bit of references to movies and other media. It might be helpful to watch She's All That with Freddie Prinze Jr. since it is referenced quite a bit and the MC has quite a fixation on it and whether it pertains to his life. (In case you haven't seen it or don't want to, it's a basic teen romance comedy about a high school jock who makes a bet about this girl, who is viewed as geeky and unattractive, and making her into the prom queen. A bit like Pygmalion, My Fair Lady, crossed with 10 Things I Hate About You sort of thing.)


One of my favorite books / series is Bear, Otter, and the Kid, also by T.J. Klune. So, it wasn't surprising that I liked this book too. What was surprising is how different the two were. Bear, Otter, and the Kid is full of angst and drama. It can be funny at times, but it is more heartbreaking. Tell Me It's Real on the other hand is fairly light and so funny. Two very different styles. What they do have in common is that they both feature complex characters who make you want to read about them.

Tell Me It's Real also manages to create some very realistic word pictures. The phrasing used at times is so right on that you can't help but picture where they are or what they are talking about. Honestly, as I'm reading, I tend to not picture books all that well. This one was so right on the mark that I couldn't keep the images out of my head. That includes normal things like laying on the grass in the park and staring up at the stars.



It also includes other gems such as this tidbit from the best text convo ever:

Did u get that pic I just sent? 

You mean the one of you with your mouth on a black dildo? 

Yeah 

No, Vince. I didn’t

and this one where Paul protests getting advice:

“It’s like all of you are after-school-specialing on me,” I groaned. “I feel so cheap and used and covered in grossness, like some twink after a bareback gang bang.”

So, yeah. This book isn't for the faint of heart.

It's rude and crude at times, with the imagery to really get right in there. And unlike so many books on the market now, it is not overfilled with never-ending sex scenes. It only has a few sweet and tame ones. So, if you read romance novels just to get off, this one won't do it for you. If you want to read good stories about interesting characters, it might be right up your alley.

About the only thing that bothered me was one missing scene. There were a couple with Paul and a woman on the same commute as him. We needed a third and final scene with her. I just think that would have been the cherry on top to have Paul and Vince singing along to the radio on their way to work and pull up alongside of her. Minor bit, but it just begged for it.

This book had some good ideas as well. I now want to call getting a cum facial getting frosted. And opening up an argyle sock and sex store to be called Sock ’N Cock is my new dream.



While this book is going on my favorites list, it will not be on everyone's. It was a bit chaotic and the phrasing was crazy. Some people have complained that they couldn't follow along and it was just too messy. For better results it's a good idea to read this book where there aren't a lot of distractions and where you can really pay attention. It's also a longer book, but it would be good to read it in solid chunks or all in one sitting if possible. Getting into the headspace is essential.

And it'd be nice to read it somewhere you can make noise. Go to the beach and scare the seagulls. One reviewer mentioned she read it on a plane and her laughter kinda freaked people out. I read it overnight and was worried my neighbors would be upset because I couldn't stifle my laughter. It is funny and hilarious and crazy.



I also found myself repeating some words because the phrasing was so spot on. I said some really weird things and am really glad no one heard me repeating things like:

“It’s the most unladylike thing about becoming a lady,” he said, giving his wrist a little twist. 

“There’s nothing greater for my self-esteem than to hear Johnny Depp call me a fanny-bandit.” 

Float like a butterfly, sting like a unicorn ;) 

SEX FACE!! >_< 

“Baby doll, I do believe you’re going to get plowed like a field around planting time,” she observed succinctly. “Gonna get seeded, that’s for damn sure.”

Go ahead, say them out-loud. You know you want to.


At First Sight #1 - Tell Me It's Real

Don't forget to check out the sequels as well. Sandy / Helena gets their own story. And of course Paul and Vince get married!

At First Sight #2 - The Queen & the Homo Jock King


At First Sight #3 - Until You


At First Sight #4 - Why We Fight