Review : Frog by Mary Calmes

Frog is a super sweet mm romance by Mary Calmes about a broken down bull rider and the love of his life, a rich neurosurgeon from San Francisco.

Weber has been wandering for most of his life since he was left alone when his family died. He doesn't feel like he's good at much, even rodeoing is getting harder as he gets older. He's finally feeling done with riding bulls and is thinking about finding a ranch where he can just be another hand. He's not sure what else to do. He thinks he's not anything special.

Cyrus has his roots planted deep. He's a well-respected doctor and all his family lives nearby, but the one person he really loves and needs is always too soon on the way to another rodeo.

A phone call from a payphone from Web on a wet evening lets Cyrus know Web is back in town. The last time they saw each other and while fighting over his leaving, Cyrus had issued an ultimatum, and Web had left anyway: leaving Cyrus regretful and terrified that he'd never see his cowboy again. With no way to contact Web, Cyrus is desperate to hold onto this chance to make up and make it clear he'll take Web any way he can get him, even if that's just a night or two whenever he passes by.

Weber doesn't want to be a bother, so keeps trying to get off the phone so he can get on another bus and go to another town. He's too long without a shower or meal to meet up with someone who exudes class like Cyrus does. But Cy doesn't care about any of that. He just wants Weber anyway he can get him. In desperation, Cy makes him promise to stay where he is and rushes over to pick him up so he can take him home where he belongs.

Web is old blue jeans and worn out cowboy boots. He has been doing the rodeo circuit for most of his life and he's not sure what else he could do. He doesn't have a regular job, money, a car, a house, or even a phone. He just drifts along between rodeos and takes ranch hand positions to fill in the gaps.

Cyrus is expensive fabrics and dress shoes. He is a recognized neurosurgeon who shows up in the society pages when he isn't living at his job. He has a well-paid job, tons of money, both a BMW and a Lexus, and a completely oversized house. His entire focus throughout his life was plodding away at becoming better.

Watching him stride toward me took my breath away. He looked like he belonged in a fashion magazine, he was so perfect. The short, thick chestnut hair was styled back from his face, the cashmere and wool topcoat accentuated the breadth of his shoulders, and the heavy wool scarf was wrapped once around his neck and hung down between the lapels of the expensive piece of outerwear. The sweater and jeans underneath, the polished boots, he was a vision, and he was intent on reaching me. In contrast, I looked like some homeless guy he was going to give some loose change to.

It felt like I’d made a mistake, and I was embarrassed of how I looked, how I smelled, and I knew in that second that I shouldn’t have called.

“Web,” he cried out.

Until he called my name.

Nothing mattered after that.

Seemingly mismatched in every way, nonetheless Web and Cy are great together.

For all that he is a drifter, Weber is a rock solid stable and dependable person. The type that you know if you jump, he will catch you. Web makes Cyrus feel secure and able to let go, something that is important for a man who has has lives depending on him every day. Web lets Cy relax enough to have fun and laugh.

Cyrus gives back too. He gives Web a home. Even if Web doesn't feel like he can stay, he knows in his heart that is where he belongs. Cy loves Web with all his heart and cares for him, something Web has been without for almost his entire life. He also wants to give him a family and security and everything he could ever want, if only Web would accept.

Weber doesn't want to be a kept man though, and he doesn't know what use a cowboy is in the city. Cy would be happy with a house spouse, a cowboy, a manny, any option that allowed him to remain with the man he loves.

You can really see how they both love each other, though they show it in opposite ways. Cy shows that he loves Web by trying to get him to stay and trying to take care of him. Web shows that he loves Cy by trying to leave and not wanting to bother him anymore. But no matter how much Web tries to stay away, he can't quite manage it. He's drawn back to Cyrus again and again.

Really, if I had anything to offer at all, I would lay claim to him, and no one but me would  ever have him ever again.  But as it was, all I could be was a diversion until he realized he could do so much better. He was a neurosurgeon. I was a homeless drifter, and this wasn’t a fairytale.

Web thinks of himself as a frog and as Cy as Prince Charming. He knows no matter how many times Cyrus kisses him, he'll still be a frog -- he isn't disguised and won't suddenly turn into a prince and the perfect match for Cy. He's just himself.

It's really adorable the way they both idolize the other. Weber thinks of Cyrus as this stunningly beautiful man who is rich and smart and could have anyone. Which is true, everyone considers Cyrus a great catch and he could take his pick.

But what Web doesn't realize is that Cyrus feels the same way about him. He knows Web doesn't have money, but that doesn't matter to him. What does matter is that he is an amazing person who charms everyone he interacts with. Web is so self-effacing, gracious, and polite that he actually garners all the attention because of it. People can't believe someone so good is real. He becomes the pied piper for kids and dogs. Cy's own sister would marry him, and his parents want to adopt him. He makes everyone pause and acknowledge what they are privileged enough to have. But Weber doesn't see. He just views himself as a useless, old cowboy with nothing to his name.

This book isn't overly dramatic or thrilling. It's more of a gentle teasing, emotion-driven story that still manages to completely draw you in. It's heartwarming. A little funny. It also makes you want to just slap Web upside the head and make him stay where he belongs.

Web's cowboy boots seem to be a bit of a metaphor for his life. At the beginning of the book, they are old and worn, with holes letting in the rainwater. When he finally allows Cyrus to help him, they get the boots resoled and also pick up some other shoes. At the end, the boots are sitting in the closet with his old shearling-lined denim jacket, not needed anymore. They are still there, but they aren't the only thing there. He is wearing improved versions that keep him warm and dry.

The book is told completely from Weber's point of view, though we also see him from other POV's when he tries to figure out why people are reacting certain ways. When people look at you with stars in their eyes, it means they think you're amazing. Weber doesn't realize that.

The pacing is pretty good. I'm not a fan of books with flashbacks as they disrupt the tale, but the couple at the beginning of the book aren't terrible, just jolting. Not a lot happens in the story, it's a pretty gentle ride. But just enough bits are added to keep things steadily interesting.

I like that the author plays with stereotypes a little. Web is an old hand at rodeo, but he's got freckles, white skin, and red hair, ginger when longer. Cyrus is upper middle class, but his skin is described as golden brown. Even though Web has not had family in years, the author doesn't take the easy out and make him a curmudgeon or scared of kids. Nope, Web is incredible with kids and fits right into Cyrus' family. Instead of a plug-in-play stereotyped mold, each character feels personally designed. No characterizations just because cowboys like this and doctors like this. Sure, Web likes horses and Cy is a little fancy, but that is because that's who they are, not because of what they do.

The editing and proofreading were right on. Mary Calmes' books always seem to be consistently decent in that regard. Someone with an eagle eye may be able to spot something, but I didn't notice problems.

The sex scenes are generally good, including a pretty raw one in a flashback to the first time Cyrus and Web met. The sex scenes occupy a large portion of the book, but they aren't treated as a replacement for love, just an addition to it that shows that even though society would dictate that the pair should be ill-suited, instead they match perfectly. Web has little control over his life, and he takes control during sex, letting Cyrus let go of his own constantly controlling nature and be free to enjoy himself for the first time.

It's a bit frustrating watching Weber fit into the Weber-sized hole in Cyrus' life and not even realize it. He's so focused on the fact that he doesn't have a job and that he doesn't know what a cowboy can do for a job in San Francisco, that he doesn't realize he could do anything and he doesn't have to be a cowboy. Web lets his pride and fear get in the way of what could be, even when he falls into a job that's perfect for him, he still doesn't realize that he can just stay.

I think we all fall a little in love with Web and understand Cyrus' desperation to just hold him tight and give him a home.

Cyrus makes Desperado by The Eagles into Web's ringtone, and that sums up so much.

It may be raining when Weber gets back to Cyrus, but it's San Francisco, there are plenty of rainbows to be seen if he just lets Cy love him.

You should get Frog now.

Get Frog Here

Reviews : Sinner's Gin by Rhys Ford

Sinner's Gin is a mm mystery romance featuring a shattered singer and the Irish cop who falls in love with him as he solves the mystery of the dead body left at his home.

With Grammy in hand, Sinner's Gin had finally achieved their goals and were celebrating the reward for all their hard work. Then, in one moment it was all over. Three of the four members dead, and Miki St John (Sinjun), the lead singer broken and barely able to get out of bed in the morning. Retreating to his converted warehouse in San Francisco, Miki's only companion is Dude, a mutt who just moved in and stayed one day.

When that mutt drags a piece of Koa wood and a cop back to the house, Miki assumes it's just another crappy thing to have happen to him. While the cop is hot, Miki knows better than to trust anyone, especially those in authority. So the former street rat applies his native tongue of snark and sarcasm and makes it clear the cop better never show up again. But their lives are fated to be intertwined by murder and dog, as just a little later the cop chases the dog home again where he discovers a murder victim in the front seat of Miki's car.

Kane Morgan has been thinking about the beautiful man all alone in the cavernous warehouse he stays secluded in. When the dog steals another item from him he uses the excuse to head over and see the lost man again. Miki may have been snarling and sneering and looking like a wraith, but there is something there. Kane can't help feeling that his attitude is hiding a damaged soul that needs him.

The dead body left for Miki could get in the way of getting to know the former singer, but Kane refuses to let it stop him. Instead he decides he will watch over him, especially when he finds out Miki knew the vic, that Miki had been his victim when he was younger and still in foster care. Before he decided the streets were safer than staying to be sexually assaulted by straight, perverted men who like little boys.

With Miki's past coming back to haunt him, the tough, Irish Catholic cop and the entire, huge Morgan family must keep the singer safe. But will this former street rat let them in?

Okay, so this series is pretty awesome. All the books and short stories are about Miki and his attempt to restart a band and the Morgan family, that is mainly made up of cops, solving murders and falling in love. There are four couples and six books, so some of the books feature the couples extending their stories. The general theme stays pretty consistent. Murderer threatens MC, other MC must help keep him safe. There isn't a ton of solving going on, this isn't that type of mystery. It's a bit more realistic; try to keep everyone safe until the killer screws up.

Miki may have been shattered by the tragedies in his life, but he's still a bit too prickly to be handled and too independent to be coddled. He may look delicate and pretty, but he's got a lot of inner strength. He's broken because he's just been strong for too long. And the one person who he had ever fully trusted, the one who saved him, his brother of the heart and former band member, Damien, is gone.

Kane showing up terrifies Miki. How can you trust again when almost every person ever has hurt you? And the one person you ever truly trusted has left you behind? Of course, the former guttersnipe instinctively flinches from any hand that comes near. But Kane knows sometimes you need to stand steady and take a few hits to tame a feral animal. Earning his trust is worth it because you can end up with one who is smart and strong enough to survive every hand life has dealt him.

Kane is the perfect match for Miki. He sees Miki's tender side. It's all wrapped up in barbed wire so it's hard to see, but it's obvious when even completely destroyed, Miki still took in a stray dog and made sure he had something to eat. And he is terrified of the Morgan family, especially the mom, but it's partially because he assumes they won't like him. Kane is a caretaker, a protector, what cops should be. All he wants to do is give Miki a steady presence that he can trust. Oh, and fuck him. Because he thinks Miki is the hottest man he's ever met.

The book can be pretty gritty at times, lots of blood and guts. Miki tends to puke at everything, but wouldn't you if someone left you a dead body or hit you in your injured knee? So, people with weak stomachs should take care.

Also, major trigger warning! Childhood sexual assault is mentioned quite a bit. There are some minor mentions of suicidal thoughts as Miki spends his days alone and in pain, his entire created family / band dead and him left alone. Later books also feature some triggering subjects: abusive parents, hooking while underage, and drug addiction / OD. All the main characters recover as much as possible in the end, but it can be hard to read about how much the boys were hurt before finding true family.

All the warnings make this book seem heavy and oppressive, and while it is hard to read at times because of the subject matter, other parts of the book are pretty funny and sweet. Miki learning to take affection from people is just adorable. Kane wants to love Miki so much and he's a very protective person, but he doesn't know how to get Miki to let him in. The Morgans are kinda crazy. Of course, Dude is the best character. I loved him in this, but it makes it so much better to read Hair of the Dog afterwards and see some scenes from his point of view.

Dude is a scraggly little blond terrier and sort of looks like this cairn terrier, but a lot brattier. I believe he might be partially based on the author's own dog, a cairn terrorist ;-)




In some ways, this book reminds me of ferret legging, with Miki being the ferret and Kane being the one wearing pants. Miki is all teeth and sharpness and a hint of mischievous sneakiness, Kane is the idiot who thinks it's worth going there with him. Talk about letting a feral beast into your pants...




Although, a later book describes Miki's origins and the beginning of Sinner's Gin as:

“One does not nurture Miki. That’s kind of like waltzing with a honey badger. I just tossed him food until it was safe enough to approach and shoved a microphone into his hand.”

So goes the taming of Miki. Be there, be reliable, and give him food. Oh, and encouraging his music, as music is a huge part of his life. He is always singing and writing songs. Kane even finds that he sings in his sleep.

The book series is mostly set in San Francisco. Rhys Ford tends to feature the city with the familiarity of someone who has lived there and learned many of its secrets. I especially like seeing another side of different areas, including Chinatown. It might be helpful to glance at a map while reading as many neighborhoods are mentioned and it will help you get a sense of place. Miki's warehouse is near Russian Hill, the Morgans are near Presidio, and there is a lot of eating to be done in Chinatown.



Miki's GTO does look better without a corpse in it.

 


Books by Rhys Ford tend to make me hungry. Food is very important to people who have had to do without, so there is a lot of relishing going on when characters eat. Also, the Morgans are Irish and feel the need to feed everyone to make sure they know they are loved. The books have actually helped me find some good sounding dishes that I was unfamiliar with as some of the books feature food from Korea, China, and other places in Asia. Another book by Rhys Ford, this one about a former assassin that becomes a ramen chef in LA, Ramen Assassin, is practically drool-worthy. Miki often eats cheap ramen and macaroni and cheese because he has no idea how to cook, but he also appreciates good ramen and fish and chips and Mexican street tacos.

Food, foster care, San Francisco (or in other books, LA and San Diego), hurt and healing. These are all common subjects in Rhys Ford's book and part of the reason they're a favorite author of mine. The stories may come across as unbelievable to those who live middle class or upper class lives, but as someone who has been poor, it is all too familiar. Learning to make due and get by is a required skill.

Miki especially exemplifies the concept of kintsugi or kintsukuroi, the Japanese art form where broken ceramics are fixed, not with hidden glue but with gold or silver to showcase the history and survival of something that might have been disposed of but is instead made glorious. He has been broken, but is only more beautiful for it.

Miki grows throughout the book. He learns to trust at least some others and most of all trust in Kane's love. Kane grows too. He learns that he can't always manage everything, sometimes he just has to go along for the ride.

There is a lot of drama and thrills. Each time the boys start relaxing their guard something else happens. So many close calls and teasing attacks. The scene with the killer is especially sad and brutal, all while making you shout hurray! Definitely grit your teeth and cheer along kind of stuff.

There's also a lot of sadness. Even having read the book several times, I still tear up and want to cuddle Miki until he feels better. It's even sadder to realize things like that happen to kids, especially foster kids. And to have gotten at least partially past his childhood to only be cut down again when he starts achieving greatness...just so sad.

I'm not Miki, but even just reading it makes it clear I would probably never trust rising out of the depths again for fear of once again getting knocked down. The higher you go, the further to fall.

But Miki takes a chance again. A chance on a dog. A chance on a cocky Irish cop. A chance on an overwhelming family who wants him to be a part of them. For someone so alone who has never known his birth family and has lost his adopted family, it take real guts to take a chance one more time.

Miki's backstory is complex, but mysterious. He doesn't know his real name, his age, or even his ethnicity, though he looks some sort of Asian mixed with European. His background is a story arc that it is also addressed in later books as he learns more about where he came from and connects the first and last books in the series. It is well-thought out and little tidbits are scattered throughout the books until the finale features all the unknown parts. It's a hell of a ride.

Kane is a bit simpler, but still good. He's the second son out of a family of eight that immigrated to San Francisco when he was young. His family history is there too; how his mother was a Finnegan and the fiery lass captured the attention of the series Donal Morgan. Kane spent summers in Ireland, his Sundays at the Catholic church, and his school days at a private school. He looks up to his big brother and alternately harasses and cares for his younger siblings.

Kane and Miki are perfect together. Kane describes it as Miki is a kite, flying free in the air, and Kane is string / anchor keeping his from being blown away. Miki gets stability and safety while Kane gets to feel the freedom of the wind. They are opposites, the man with no family, and the man with sometimes too much family, but together they become something better.

And their chemistry is amazing. From the first moment when Miki opens the door, Kane wants him. It's almost like instalove, but more like fate chiming in and saying "this one, this is the one for you". Of course, cops are trained to assess things quickly, so it makes sense that Kane sees what's before him and has the determination to coax his man to his side. Miki wants Kane too, he really really does, but his uncertainty and past abuses make him hesitant. It takes him time before he can be intimate.

As the characters fit, so do the sex scenes. They tend to be less porno and more romance. Some people seem upset they don't just fuck and instead make love, but those also tend to be the people who want to know less about the characters and less about the stories and instead just want them as fuel for sex scenes. Too bad those people don't just go read porn or erotica and save the romance novels for us. The sex scenes in this book don't overpower the story, but later books tend to have more sex scenes. Perhaps the writer listened to the complainers too much.

The plot is at turns complex and simple. Cop sees the man he wants and is determined to have him, no matter what chaos is going on around them. And there is chaos. It's pretty fast-paced at times because a lot happens. But it can also be a bit confusing because so much happens. There are a few slower parts where the guys are just sharing space and getting to know one another. But this is at heart a story of two men finding each other and learning to trust.

The editing of the book is pretty good. There's a few minor issues, but nothing bad enough to put a reader off.

Not all loose ends are tied into bows during this book. The author obviously was intending this to be the start of a series, so there are some mysteries began in this one that won't be solved until the end of the final book. The smaller story arc is solved, the murderer caught and his motive figured out (as much as you can understand what happens in the heads of killers). But, the last bit of this Sinner's Gin reveals a huge secret that is a lead in to the next book. You may want to have the second book handy as you'll probably want to start it as soon as this book is over. It starts some soap opera-level drama in book 2 as we read about a new couple, one of Kane's cousins and a surprise character. Very "surprise m*therf*ckers!"

As a cute touch the lyrics to some of Sinner's Gin songs are listed at the start of each chapter. Music is a huge part of the books as Miki is a singer / songwriter, and he later puts together a band once more. Musicians will especially love a lot about these books, but unlike some music-focused books, knowing about music isn't necessary to reading them. It is just the right amount of music for everyone to enjoy the stories.

There are only six books in the Sinner's series, but there are a host of shorts that add marvelous detail to the world. Here is the Sinner's series reading order:

Sinners 01 - Sinner's Gin
Sinners 1.5 - Hair of the Dog (most from Dude's POV)
Sinners 02 - Whiskey and Wry
Sinners 2.5 - The Devil's Brew (Valentine's Day for the inexperienced)
Sinners 2.6 - Interview with Miki and Damie
Sinners 2.7 - Interview with Kane and Sionn
Sinners 03 - Tequila Mockingbird
Sinners 3.4 - Wild Turkey (Thanksgiving dinner with the family)
Sinners 3.5 - Rotgut Gin (saying goodbye)
Sinners 3.8 - A Touch of Irish (how to celebrate an anniversary)
Sinners 3.75 - Shot Glass Sin (dude, we're getting the band back together!)
Sinners 04 - Sloe Ride
Sinners 4.5 - Applejack Shots and Beer (shall we go touring once again)
Sinners 05 - Absinthe of Malice
Sinners 06 - Sin and Tonic
Sinners 6.1 - Last Call Part 01 - Miki and Damie in the Park
Sinners 6.2 - Last Call Part 02 - Miki and Kane Play Nerf
Sinners 6.3 - Last Call Part 03 - Brigid and Donal in the Kitchen
Sinners 6.4 - Last Call Part 04 - Miki and Donal Making Rice
Sinners 6.5 - Last Call Part 05 - Damie and Sionn at the Beach
Sinners 6.6 - Last Call Part 06 - Quinn and Rafe on the Balcony
Sinners 6.7 - Last Call Part 07 - Con and Forest's Wedding
Sinners 6.8 - Holiday Story with Con and Forest
Sinners 6.9 - Holiday Story with Kane and Miki

Sinners 07 - 'Nother Sip of Gin - Anthology

Really, don't forget to check out the free short stories by this author. They are adorable snapshots that enhance the books. The shorts are on their website.
Click here to go to the Free Shorts section.
The blog is also pretty good and random.

And for those who enjoy Easter eggs, there are other book tie-ins. The Cole McGinnis series and 415 Ink series by Rhys Ford have brief cameos and mentions about the band. And Mary Calmes' Marshals series book 3 Tied up in Knots has Miro meet Kane when he was San Francisco. They aren't needing to be read to enjoy this series, but it's fun to see the whole universe tied together, like where Damie gets his tattoo, where that tattoo artist goes, who listens to Sinner's Gin and is impacted by their music, etc. The Cole McGinnis series precedes the Sinner's series while the 415 Ink series (also set in San Francisco) follows. The 415 Ink series is fairly similar to this series, though it features a tattoo shop and associated found family.

Sinner's Gin can stand alone, but like Miki learns, things are better with more.

So, if you want to at turns cry, be happy, be pissed, and read some sexy bits, you too might want to read Sinner's Gin. After all, a tragically-broken singer, a hot Irish cop, a chaotic huge family, and a murdered victim left in your car, what could go wrong...

Get the entire Sinner's Gin series here

Get Sinner's Gin

(Sinners Series Book 1)

And the rest of the Sinner's series:

Whiskey and Wry

(Sinners Series Book 2)

The Devil's Brew

(Sinners Series Short 2.5)

Tequila Mockingbird

(Sinners Series Book 3)

Sloe Ride

(Sinners Series Book 4)

Absinthe of Malice

(Sinners Series Book 5)

Sin and Tonic

(Sinners Series Book 6)

'Nother Sip of Gin

(Sinners Series Book 7)

And if you want the whole enchilada to really enjoy those Easter eggs, check out:

Dirty Kiss

(Cole McGinnis Mysteries Book 1)

by Rhys Ford


Rebel

(415 Ink Series Book 1)

by Rhys Ford


Tied Up In Knots

(Marshalls Series Book 3)

by Mary Calmes